9. Your Pain

The pain you feel is unlike anything you have experienced before. It is not just unique in its intensity, but also in its type. Just like a cut feels different to a burn, this was something else entirely. At the same time, the pain is not surprising. Somehow it is exactly what you would have expected to feel if someone used a chainsaw to cut off your leg.

You are grateful for the ball gag in your mouth, for being there for you to bite into its rubber as hard as you can while also letting out a primal muffled scream.

It must have not taken more than ten seconds for the chainsaw to cut clean through your leg, but it felt like eternity.

You push your head hard against the wooden table you are tied to. You feel no urge to look up at the bloody mess that once was your leg. You know your leg was no longer yours since the intense pain of the cutting was over and the sound of shredding meat and bone was replaced with the more familiar roar of chainsaw cutting through wood.

Then the sound stopped. In the new silence it was very easy to hear the sound of footsteps walking away from the table and the clank of the chainsaw being thrown aside.

How did you get here? What was the last thing you did? You remembered everything else about you, but not that. Who was this guy and why was he doing this to you?

These questions were gnawing at your mind when you woke up and scattered away like rats once the pain started. Now they came fluttering back. Once you hear the footsteps heading back towards the table, these questions disappear again, swallowed by a new question: “What now?”

You could probably lift your head a little and look, but you do not dare. Then you realize you are unable to raise your head. You feel dizzy and heavy. How much blood are you losing from that bloody stump?

Through blurry eyes (are you crying?) you see a figure towering above you. A perfectly normal looking man. He is smiling at you pleasantly. What is he holding in his hands?

Oh, of course. You feel relieved to see your leg, as if you are reunited with a loved one you have not seen for years. It does not make any sense. None of this makes any sense.

Then the man raises your leg (what is he doing?) and puts it down right on your face, stump first.

You shut your eyes as hard as you can and try turning your face away. Wet gooey flesh rubs against your face, a bone cuts through your flesh. You realize moving your head frantically is only making it worse so you stop. Breathing is impossible. Maybe it is for the best.

Then the leg goes away and you hear laughter.

The man never did anything to stop your bleeding. Lights out.